


signal in the sky

by cyaneidae



Series: I Wanna Dance With Somebody [1]
Category: Black Panther (2018), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: (damn you infinity war), (i'm not sorry), (minor and not the devastating ones), Angst, F/M, Gen, I'm really sorry, Infinity War spoilers, Pre-Relationship, infinity war spoilers for real this time, shuri is 18 in IW do i really need to tag this, since infinity war gave me grief i'm shamelessly writing my otp into its fabric, spitefully writing this in light of how infinity war basically ignored the bp end credit scene, the devastating ones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-04-30 14:02:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14498595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyaneidae/pseuds/cyaneidae
Summary: Bucky is offered a replacement arm. A choice. And war is coming.





	1. and I wanna feel something again

**Author's Note:**

> My headcanon to a scene in Infinity War. @thefudge inspired me, I'm using my Infinity War tears to retroactively make it a Shuri/Bucky movie. Title by the song of the same name by Matt Hires.

It isn’t the first time he’s been offered a replacement arm. Nor the first time while in Wakanda, either. He’s been here two years, after all (even if some of it was time spent on ice again)…and this is the same vibranium arm he was offered months ago—though now with subtle upgrades that aren’t quite so subtle at all to him, upgrades that scream of _her_ , of the original creator. His mouth is halfway to a rueful smile before he remembers why he refused the first time. And the second. She didn’t ask after that…understanding just _why_ he did so. (He appreciates her asking…and also then allowing his refusal. One of many reasons why he adores her— _here_ — _her_ : the choices he’s allowed, the freedom he’s allowed for the first time in decades…to choose who and what he wants to be.)

 

A glimmer of gold in front of him focuses his thoughts again. He remembers why he refused the first and the second times. When things were peaceful. Back when all a replacement arm did was make him think of _war_ and _being controlled_ and _carrying out missions_. And not questioning anything. (Not choosing anything. Not having a choice in anything.) And now he’s being offered this particular arm—his second replacement—a _third_ time, just at the moment when he can no longer ignore the outside world.

 

Wakanda has been a wonderful refuge for him. Wakanda has become _home_ for him. But right now, with the vibranium arm in front of his face, he feels like he’s sliding back into his HYDRA days.

 

“So where’s the fight?” he asks. More like sighs. _It always ends in a fight,_ he once (or twice) told Steve.

 

“On its way,” the king gravely tells him.

 

Perhaps it _is_ somewhat different though. This time he’s been offered a choice.

 

He thinks of her again. Of the princess. Shuri. He thinks of her smile, her laugh, her way of getting _him_ to smile again even when he didn’t think he could. He thinks of her brilliance, how she was able to design this magnificent replacement arm—of the likely countless hours she spent adjusting it!—just to gracefully accept his refusal to take it. He thinks of all the time she spent helping him overcome his HYDRA programming; how she saw his memories and didn’t judge him for them, but instead helped him overcome them, helped him become a better man. He thinks of watching Wakandan sunsets by the river, her helping with his hair when the river children weren’t around to do it ( _or_ after they’d teasingly messed it up).

 

He knows she nor T’Challa are pressuring him at this moment. He’s been given a choice. And can he really protect his new home, the people he loves, with just one arm?

 

He reaches out towards the metallic arm, feels it with his one good hand. Then he looks up at the king and nods. It is time.


	2. we forget to smile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shuri's POV to chapter 1.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I *wanted* to work on my fluffy, HAPPY, Shuri/Bucky WIP. But my brain said ANGST ANGST ANGST and INSPIRATION INSPIRATION INSPIRATION so /throws up hands/ have this instead. (hides)

She does not come. The third time. When they offer the replacement arm to him again.

 

***

 

 _"He said_ no _," she whispers vehemently, "The first AND the second time."_

 

_They came into her lab dressed formally, as if for a royal challenge...and with the same gravity. Her brother looks at her seriously and says, "I did not forget. But circumstances have changed."_

 

 _"That is exactly_ why _he should be left in peace! That is exactly why he said no the first time!"_

 

_Her brother just looks at her, nowhere as ashamed as she wishes he was. He is resolute. He is King, and it is because he is such a good king that he does this. His people come first. He must protect them. He must fight for them. And sometimes that means dragging an old man back out to war, no matter how much the man deserves to be left alone._

 

_"All he's done is fight other people's wars! We would be no different than--than...we ought not ask this of him!" Her voice gets more high-pitched but also weaker. She has lost this argument and she knows it._

 

 _So she will not come with. Even though it is_ her _arm. The one she designed and labored over. The arm she painstakingly (and deep-down, perhaps...delightedly) measured his other bicep (and triceps, and forearm) for, to make it symmetrical._

 

_She will not see his crest-fallen expression a third time, as he weighs the pluses and minuses again. (The minuses are even greater and the pluses the same. It is a grave statement, what they offer him, especially now.) She will not picture exactly what he is thinking of when he sees the arm. She knows. She knows all too well--she has seen his memories, she knows what he does not want to remember, what he desperately wants to forget and cannot--_

 

_She will not come._

 

***

 

So she tinkers in her lab while they go off to offer the replacement arm to one James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes again. The Winter Soldier. The White Wolf. The man who is still recovering, who still doesn't know who or what he wants to be.

 

If she accidentally loses a kimoyo bead under a table after a particularly aggressive movement, then swears viciously in Xhosa, no one around her says anything. Largely because she has forced everyone else to vacate the room for the near future--giving the excuse of a project that needs her particular concentration and expertise.

 

***

 

" _You drop this?" he asks, kneeling down to pick the kimoyo bead off the floor. She gives him a grateful smile and holds out her hand. He gives her a small smile back as he hands her the bead. It's a nice smile. She thinks that perhaps he should do it more often. She might make it her personal mission to get him to smile more._

 

_"Thanks! Couldn't do without it. But hold on! There's something I need to show you." She smiles broader. She has a surprise for him._

 

 _Shuri leads him over to the black case in which lays the replacement arm. She knows why he refused it the first time. The war, the memories, the missions, the programming, the lack of choice. But this time he_ has _a choice. A good one. And she's made a lot of adjustments to it she thinks he'll like._

 

_She triggers the sound system in her lab. A peppy song starts playing, something she found while searching for 1940's music._

 

_"Now, I know what you're thinking! But, consider: T'Challa and Nakia's wedding. Dancing. You can't really dance with one arm. Well, you could...but it'd be very unwieldy and I am not going to have a partner who refuses a perfectly good arm and doesn't know how to dance one-armed."_

 

_She sees the startled, antelope-in-headlights expression on his face. She holds up her hands in a gesture of peace. "No war. No missions. Just dancing. Fun. We gotta re-teach you how to do that." He is still silent, with that same shocked look on his face, and she starts rambling._

 

_"Weren't you big into dancing? Taking girls dancing? This should be old hat for you, White Wolf!" She shoves him playfully, lightly on the shoulder missing an arm. He jerks back a little, clearly still startled._

 

_"Orrrrrrr not. You don't have to dance. But it would make great use of the new arm, Bucky!" Shuri finally opens the case, eager to show off her adjustments. There is the gold trim and inlay...the extra range of motion he'll only notice when he puts it on. And especially if he dances. Speaking of--_

 

 _"You really need to try it on. So I can_ at least _see if the adjustments I made to it work," she says, touching a bit of the arm, tracing down to the hand. "To see if you can spin me faster than--"_

 

_"--No." He gently but firmly grabs her wrist. She looks him in the eye and sees the anguish, the conflict still there. She knows yet again what he is imagining. The first time, when she offered the arm, she was foolish to not consider the implications and strings that came with it in his mind. This second time, she is more foolish for thinking that a happy, peaceful event would allay his fears and memories._

 

_"Okay." She lets go of the arm, still staring into his eyes. He still has that super-serious expression on his face. He also has not let go of her wrist. She is really going to miss dancing with him. Funny, that you can miss something you never had._

 

_"I'm sorry," she says, quieter._

 

_"Not as sorry as I am," he says. "I want--I want to--but I can't. What I did--what this reminds me of... This is so wonderful, Shuri, thank you. But I can't."_

 

 _"I know," she says. She does. She's also really going to miss their dance that never happened. Guess they'll have to keep metaphorically dancing around this, whatever_ this _is. Or maybe it's just all in her head, anyway..._

 

_(Never mind that this all becomes moot mere months later. T'Challa and Nakia's wedding is put on hold with the oncoming war. And the dance Bucky didn't give her? It disappears into the wind, just like the royal wedding. Just like both men.)_

 

 _But then he smiles sadly at her. "Thank you," he says again. She will remember that sad smile forever. But she doesn't want to. She wants to make him smile in happiness. In laughter. She's done it before, rarely. She wants to do it again. She doesn't want to remember this sad smile of his...a sadness that's_ her _fault._

 

***

 

She pictures that smile of his now. Somehow, she doubts even _that_ graces his face now, as he meets T'Challa and Okoye and Ayo...and the replacement arm. She pictures his face solemn, hard. Possibly even angry. It's a third time they're offering the arm and all the strings attached to it. War is on the horizon. He is being asked to do what he _had_ to do for decades: fight for someone else. Without much of a choice. _Well, he might have_ some _choice here...but not much_ , she thinks. She knows how much he thinks himself in T'Challa's debt. In Wakanda's debt. In her debt.

 

She wants to tell him that he has a choice. She wants to tell him it's okay to refuse again. She wants to tell him he needs to come back, _after,_ if he chooses to fight...that she worked too hard on that arm, on him and his memories. That he's worth it. That he deserves a second ( _third)_ chance at life.

 

He has a choice.

 

So she does not come. She will not make him feel like he owes her anything. He doesn't. _Except...maybe...._ no, that's not fair at all. That's just a silly, girlish dream.

 

She does not come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter titles are lyrics in "sober up" by AJR, cause that's a song I've been listening to on repeat lately
> 
> come find me on [tumblr](http://thestolenrelic.tumblr.com)!

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written fanfic since June 2016 and now two Mondays in a row I scribbled out 500+ words for this ship I've been head over heels for since Black Panther's end end credit scene.
> 
> I have a happier (& longer) Shuri/Bucky WIP I started before this one (before IW came out) but this headcanon grabbed hold and wouldn't let go tonight so have at this for now. I promise, more Shuri/Bucky ficlets from me to come. I will help paddle this lifeboat, dammit!


End file.
